sexual racism analysis in gay community

Hi guys
I am a Korean gay guy lives in Ireland, I have never posted any formal blog before but after I have read about other people's sexual racism experience in gay community, I feel I need to write something about it. First of all, please excuse my English as English is not my mother tongue, second of all my opinion is based on my personal experience, so it might contains bios.

I came to Ireland in 1999, during that time, there wasn’t any negative comments like “No fats, no fems, no Asians” on the gaydar. About 2 years later, there’s more and more racism comments about Asian and coloured people. I was really hurt and it makes me feel unwanted just because my skin and racial feature. But I’m more shocked as I always consider gay community as my own family and friends; they are the people who can understand and trust. Since then my view about gay scene changed a bit, my confidence just not the same as I used to be, I feel unsafe sometimes in the gay bar. This really bothers me, eventually I told my boyfriend ( he is Irish) what’s going on in my mind… He looks so guilty and sad although it wasn’t his fault, he holds me really tight and he told me he will help me through this. He is going to help me find out why some GAY men are so nasty to his Asian boyfriend.

Type one-Mummy’s boy

Fact: some gay men just really in secured about themselves, They don’t consider their gay people with colour as a family, instead they think we are competitor. maybe the man they like got taken by Asians before? Their boyfriend dumped them because he find there’s a nicer guy apparently is asian? Or maybe my boyfriend is too sexy and they haven’t got one? During the Second World War, there are gay guys like this, save themselves by giving away other gay man’s home address to German army. I call these people insecure and selfish.

Type two- Cant get a life and not that straight acting

Gaydar has the section allowing you to describe what you are looking for, ok guys, there’s no section asking you what kind of guys you don’t like, ok? Some guys describe themselves easy going and very straight acting, then they write in the “what you are looking for” section : I am NOT looking for old, NOT asian , NOT fat, Not fem, oh by the way, just NOT my thing , no offence.” It just makes me laugh so much, you write down everything you aren’t looking for in the “what you looking for section”. Oh by the way, no offence? Lol one day you are going to get old, what are you going to do? I haven’t notice any straight guy in a dating site leave any comments like: “ok ladies, let’s get ready for me. I am very straight acting and I don’t fancy Asians, fat people, old ladies, black ladies, manly ladies. No offence, I am very straight acting, please feel free to contact if you aren’t the people above” LOL not that straight acting. My boyfriend used to have gay friends like this and they aren’t straight acting at all, trust me.
Type three- revengeful copy-cat

I actually noticed huge amount of people: Who are over 35 white guys; Who are Latino or Spanish(well coloured people too) ; Who are Asians themselves. They post negative comments about other people. I really feel sorry for these groups of people, in real life they got bullied by the family and the straight community, feel unwanted by the other people. So why do they doing this? The only reason I can think of is most of them not doing well in the real sex life, so they say “Fuck it, I don’t get anyone anyway, I don’t care if other people like me or not, I am a loser, I am so hurt and I want to hurt other people for my personal pleasure” True or not? Does it match you? Keep it real and think about it.

Type four- I am so sexy and I don’t like people who is worse than me, but believe me, I am a nice people. Oh yes, I am.

Most people who left the sexual racism comments are ugly, as I explained to you above. But some of them are every pretty and fit. Why do they want to inform “old”, “fem” or “coloured” people that they are unwanted then? Oh yes, they know they are pretty and they don’t like “ugly” people just like some straight guy don’t give a shit about gay man’s life. They are posh, they are fab, and they live the life you can’t even dream about. Most of them are young and they aren’t true to themselves, most of them will find trouble to live in the society in the future and eventually they find there are a lot of people who are better and even cruel and nasty. I am Paris Hilton and I am posh. LOL straight acting please.

Type five- the true racist but honey I cant admit it

Oh yeah , this is developed country, we all protected, even gays and coloured people. But honey I am gay and racist? Oh my God, what should I do? , Ok, I will just leave a comment to let those Asian people know they are unwanted and I cant let anyone think I am gay and racist as it just sound too bad. These kinds of people hurt me the most. They usually left a comments on their profile “no Asians please” then they add on “ I am not racist , I had lots of Asian friends actually and I just don’t want to waste your time, I don’t like lots of white guys also, for example the fat ones” they make me so angry ! Fact, they know an Asian guy is going to get upset by viewing this, that’s why he have to explain blah blah blah. Fact , you write down you don’t like the fat white guys, that’s bully and disrespect other people, so please don’t explain to me like that, it’s just going to upset more people. Fact about wasting my time, wasting my time or not is my decision, it’s not up to you. You have many Asian friends in real life? To your poor asian friends, they haven’t got a clue what kind of person you really are yet. If you aren’t racist, can I call you nasty queen? I think you have so much bios and you don’t even like yourself being gay.


Finally
To my gay asian brothers:
I want you to be strong, be confident, It wasn’t your fault if there’s someone try to be nasty to us. Don’t let them get you. You are the only one who haven’t realised how sexy you are.

To my gay white brothers in general:
I want to say thank you to most of you, for teaching me, educating me and protecting me. Especially Philip who just passed away, you were only 19 and you always be there for me and standing up for me. Thanks for everything, I pray for you everyday.

To my boyfriend:
Thanks for showing me a perfect man, a gentle man and a good man.

To those sexual racism people
I don’t hate you, I just want you to know, in the end of day, we all gay, I am not able to hate you. People are people, we aren’t that different. I know people have different experience in their life and some people may find it hard to deal with people different backgrounds. Fair enough, I am not here forcing you to like me but please, don’t hurt me and the other people you don’t like. In your profile , write down what you are looking for rather what you dislike. Thanking you for being a gentle man.